Woman Injured in Power Tool Sex Toy Encounter

Maryland State Police airlifted the 27-year-old woman to Prince George’s County Hospital Center early Sunday morning after she was injured in an incident involving a sex toy attached to a saber saw blade, TheBayNet.com first reported.

At first I thought this was talking about a circular buzz saw, and I was completely stumped trying to figure out the um, kinkiness to be found. Unless you were attaching said sex toy precisely centered upon the axis of high speed rotation… but there are probably ways to achieve a similarly unpleasant effect without a fearsome blade of death.  I’m sure one can find a sex toy attachment for a dremel tool if you’re into the whole angular momentum/torque thing.  But actually a saber saw is a reciprocal saw, i.e. back and forth, a mechanical handsaw:

Ok, I think I see what they were getting at here.  Offhand, this sounds like the man’s idea; just hold down the trigger and let a machine do the work so he doesn’t have to.  It’s so obvious, simple, and brilliant, I can’t believe no one thought of this before!

…but JesusAllahBuddha, take the blade off next time.  I’m reminded of a recent internet meme.